Oh your happy in life? Well let me continue to tell you how miserable I am, so I can take that happiness away from you

Oh your happy in life? Well let me continue to tell you how miserable I am, so I can take that happiness away from you - Oh your happy in life? Well let me continue to tell you how miserable I am, so I can take that happiness away from you  Debbie Downer

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My doctor says, with my arteries in their condition, it's highly unlikely I'll live to see seventy

My doctor says, with my arteries in their condition, it's highly unlikely I'll live to see seventy

The problem that really keeps me up at night is feline AIDS It's the number one killer of domestic cats

The problem that really keeps me up at night is feline AIDS It's the number one killer of domestic cats

They never did catch that anthrax guy

 They never did catch that anthrax guy

You know who doesn’t loved being covered in oil? Sea birds

You know who doesn’t loved being covered in oil? Sea birds

You know who's excited about Christmas? the credit card companies

You know who's excited about Christmas? the credit card companies

By the way it's official I can't have children

By the way it's official I can't have children

Wake up The corn belt is now the crystal meth belt

Wake up The corn belt is now the crystal meth belt

Ever since they found Mad Cow Disease in the U.S., I'm not taking any chances It can live in your body for years, before it ravages your brain

Ever since they found Mad Cow Disease in the U.S., I'm not taking any chances It can live in your body for years, before it ravages your brain

By the way, it's official, they've located my birth mother Deceased

 By the way, it's official, they've located my birth mother Deceased

Guess who's in bed together: North Korea and Nukes

Guess who's in bed together: North Korea and Nukes

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