19,670 shares
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Accidently press unlock button miles from car better lock it to be sure
82,095 shares
Crossing a one-way street Looks both ways
174,308 shares
Can't leave facebook open and have porn open at the same time They'll know
644,513 shares
Hits snooze on on the alarm clock Spends the next 9 minutes wide awake worrying it accidently turned off
192,193 shares
farts in public when it's cold out checks ass to see if steam came out
169,546 shares
KNOWS THAT THE APARTMENT IS EMPTY EVERY AFTERNOON BETTER CHECK EVERY FUCKIN' ROOM BEFORE TURNING THE PORN ON
265,378 shares
Read about diseases with one in a million prevalence Convinced I have at least six of them
106,360 shares
Slight chest discomfort Better write my will
105,290 shares
3+5? Better use calculator
138,059 shares
Game Auto-Saves Better save it manually just to be sure
434,443 shares
Laugh more daily
