9247 shares
works at burger king slips an onion ring into every order of fries
118,909 shares
Microwaving at midnight when everyone is asleep opens it with one second left so it doesn't beep
310,000 shares
Has an iphone doesn't try to sell you on it
18,799 shares
eats in fast food restaurant wipes crumbs off table top
121,981 shares
Breaks up with hot GF. Realizes still has naked photos of her on computer. Deletes them.
20,052 shares
calls the number on the "how am i driving?" bumper sticker to compliment the driver
25,660 shares
Brings cute girl to party who he has no intentions of sleeping with
35,989 shares
plays call of duty goes for objectives, not kills
118,989 shares
Sees you waiting to use a computer at the library Signs out of reddit and lets you use it
43,365 shares
Finds your dead body deletes internet history before calling police
181,379 shares
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