9153 shares
Oh, so you want to sleep? Here are some thoughts about life, the universe and what you become when you die
98,802 shares
Did you just turn that test in? Because I finally figured out how to solve that problem and man, did you fuck up.
507,768 shares
Oh, class is ending? I'll make sure the erection is ready.
399,105 shares
Oh your alarm clock is going off? Let me just add the sound to your dream
53,475 shares
sets alarm for seven Wakes up at 4:00, 5:00 and 6:00 to check the time OVERSLEEPS
352,311 shares
Falls back asleep after turning alarm off Makes you dream that you got up and got ready for work
155,737 shares
Doesn't have any pain receptors Gives you a headache just to show you who's lord and master of your universe
84,730 shares
Convinces you to do something Then makes you feel bad for doing it
244,649 shares
Carrying something you can't just put down Heres an itch 4 different places on your body
145,060 shares
Finally falling asleep realizes something you said earlier in the day could be horribly misinterpreted
287,587 shares
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