9237 shares
Oh, so you want to sleep? Here are some thoughts about life, the universe and what you become when you die
99,063 shares
Did you just turn that test in? Because I finally figured out how to solve that problem and man, did you fuck up.
508,042 shares
Oh, class is ending? I'll make sure the erection is ready.
399,426 shares
Oh your alarm clock is going off? Let me just add the sound to your dream
53,757 shares
sets alarm for seven Wakes up at 4:00, 5:00 and 6:00 to check the time OVERSLEEPS
352,602 shares
Falls back asleep after turning alarm off Makes you dream that you got up and got ready for work
155,968 shares
Doesn't have any pain receptors Gives you a headache just to show you who's lord and master of your universe
85,019 shares
Convinces you to do something Then makes you feel bad for doing it
244,967 shares
Carrying something you can't just put down Heres an itch 4 different places on your body
145,346 shares
Finally falling asleep realizes something you said earlier in the day could be horribly misinterpreted
287,854 shares
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