Remember when I said I didn't poop? I LIED.
I'll pretend to be asleep so then they'll have to carry me to bed
it would be a shame if all your play-doh was... one color
Daylight savings time? I'll get up even earlier than normal to really fuck with your mind
I'll just tell them
my legs are tired So they have to carry me for the rest of the trip
Thanks for the stickers mom and dad They'll look great on the car windows
I'm going to wait until they paint the wall THen i color all over it with markers
After I spend my first 12 years sucking the life and money out of my parents I'll complain about how bad they raised me!
Laugh more daily