for the record penguin

for the record penguin - RALLYING THE TROOPS AGAINST EYEZA IS JUST AS EASY AS REALLYING THE TROOPS FOR THE CONSTITUTION. EXCEPT THE CONSTITUTION IS A FACADE AND EYEZA IS A COMPLETE BADASS. THE CONSERVATIVES ARE SUCH IDIOTS. EYEZA IS A POW BECAUSE IF EVERYONE KNEW THE TRUTH THEIR WORLD WOULD CEASE TO EXIST. HE IS A PLAUSIBLE DENIABILITY POW.  Socially Awkward Penguin

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Get hugged by attractive girl and freeze She notices and says sorry

Get hugged by attractive girl and freeze She notices and says sorry

Food falls off fork put fork in mouth and pretend to eat anyway

Food falls off fork put fork in mouth and pretend to eat anyway

wants human company hates human company

wants human company hates human company

Receives a text message wait 5 minutes to reply to look busy

Receives a text message wait 5 minutes to reply to look busy

friend wants to see what's on your ipod prepare to be judged

friend wants to see what's on your ipod prepare to be judged

car stops at the crosswalk to let you walk by immediately feel as though you have to run at the speed of light as to not inconvenience the driver

car stops at the crosswalk to let you walk by immediately feel as though you have to run at the speed of light as to not inconvenience the driver

Staying at girlfriend's parents house for the first time holds in poo for 4 days

Staying at girlfriend's parents house for the first time holds in poo for 4 days

make all the same turns as the car ahead of you Put on turn signals early so they don't think you're following them on purpose

make all the same turns as the car ahead of you Put on turn signals early so they don't think you're following them on purpose

Applying for a job that needs references probably wouldn't have gotten the Job anyway

Applying for a job that needs references  probably wouldn't have gotten the Job anyway

friend talking to you while peeing cant pee Pretend you did and come back later to actually pee

friend talking to you while peeing cant pee Pretend you did and come back later to actually pee
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