for the record penguin

for the record penguin - A USA POLITICIAN DOING AN IDITAROD  BODY DOUBLE DOES RACE WITH SLED DOGS. POLITICIAN TAKES CREDIT. POLITICIAN COVERS UP EVIDENCE AND KILLS ALL BUT 1 SLED DOGS. TURNS THE REMAINING SLED DOG INTO A LAP DOG. HOOKS THE BODY DOUBLE UP WITH A PHONY WIFE AND KILLS THEM BOTH OFF WITH PLAUSIBLE DENI Socially Awkward Penguin

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"Thank you, have a great night." 10:30 AM

Resceptionist: "Your appointment with the doctor is on tuesday the 19th at 4" Me: "am or pm"?

Resceptionist:

has a crush on a girl Sends Giberish text pretending sat on phone to initiate conversation

has a crush on a girl Sends Giberish text pretending sat on phone to initiate conversation

receive gift from distant relative "you should call and say thank you!" FUCK

receive gift from distant relative

Switch to another tab when boss passes by tab is still unrelated to work

Switch to another tab when boss passes by tab is still unrelated to work

React in a socially acceptable manner Get excited about it

React in a socially acceptable manner Get excited about it

move your things off a seat to let someone sit down they don't sit down

move your things off a seat to let someone sit down they don't sit down

Cute girl: Wanna study for finals with me? "Nah, I study better alone"

Cute girl: Wanna study for finals with me?

Gets dressed up to go out. Too self conscious to talk to anyone. Looks like a huge bitch.

Gets dressed up to go out.
Too self conscious to talk to anyone. Looks like a huge bitch.

Calling customer support, gonna be aggressive to get what you want... Cute sounding girl answers the phone, must talk nicely to her.

Calling customer support, gonna be aggressive to get what you want... Cute sounding girl answers the phone, must talk nicely to her.
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