for the record penguin

for the record penguin - A USA POLITICIAN DOING AN IDITAROD  BODY DOUBLE DOES RACE WITH SLED DOGS. POLITICIAN TAKES CREDIT. POLITICIAN COVERS UP EVIDENCE AND KILLS ALL BUT 1 SLED DOGS. TURNS THE REMAINING SLED DOG INTO A LAP DOG. HOOKS THE BODY DOUBLE UP WITH A PHONY WIFE AND KILLS THEM BOTH OFF WITH PLAUSIBLE DENI Socially Awkward Penguin

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10 min to pick from the menu, friend orders, same thing before you Pick something else at random

10 min to pick from the menu, friend orders, same thing before you Pick something else at random

Make a new girl friend Envision rest of life with her

Make a new girl friend Envision rest of life with her

Takes getting laid advice from socially awesome penguin goes to prison

Takes getting laid advice from socially awesome penguin goes to prison

Girl puts her head on your shoulder Don't move. Don't even breath.

Girl puts her head on your shoulder Don't move. Don't even breath.

Someone new talks to you sweat uncontrollably and turn red

Someone new talks to you sweat uncontrollably and turn red

A GIRL PAID ATTENTION TO ME I THINK I'M IN LOVE

A GIRL PAID ATTENTION TO ME I THINK I'M IN LOVE

spend a couple nights at friend's house never ask for food

spend a couple nights at friend's house never ask for food

"No thanks, I am just browsing" Can't find what I am looking for

ready for check, waitress doesn't notice three hour lunch

ready for check, waitress doesn't notice three hour lunch

show sap to friend they don't get it

show sap to friend they don't get it
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