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Most Females - HI, I'M A  TOTALLY SELF-ABSORBED CUNT, FLOATING THROUGH LIFE EXPECTING PEOPLE TO WORSHIP AND SUPPORT ME, WHILE CONTRIBUTING ALMOST NOTHING, BUT MY HEAD IS SO FAR UP SOME JERK'S ASS THAT I'M TOO STUPID TO REALIZE THAT EVERYONE ELSE REALIZES IT. Overly Attached Girlfriend

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When are you going to switch to facebook timeline? then you could have two profile pictures of us

When are you going to switch to facebook timeline? then you could have two profile pictures of us

I've been practicing my new signature For when we get married

I've been practicing my new signature
 For when we get married

''That's what she said'' who is ''she'' ?

''That's what she said'' who is ''she'' ?

why are you getting so dressed up? are there new girls in your office?!

why are you getting so dressed up? are there new girls in your office?!

it's not fair that you get to be with yourself all the time and not me

it's not fair that you get to be with yourself all the time and not me

Roses are red, Bullets are lead Take me back now, Or get shot in the head

Roses are red,
Bullets are lead Take me back now,
Or get shot in the head

Texts you at 6AM "I think I'm pregnant" Makes you wait 4 hours to say "Just Kidding"

Texts you at 6AM

hey i just met you if you dont date me you'll go to prison I'll say you raped me

hey i just met you 
if you dont date me you'll go to prison
I'll say you raped me

tell her you need to cut grass drives by to make sure you're cutting grass

tell her you need to cut grass drives by to make sure you're cutting grass

Guess What You don't have to see your ex ever again, ever

Guess What You don't have to see your ex ever again, ever
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