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Asked girlfriend where she wanted to eat She gave a decisive answer
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Have to babysit a kid Sleeps the whole time, get paid to pet a cat
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Justin Bieber says he is the Kurt Cobain of his generation we all know how this ends
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Girls you used to date getting pregnant. None are yours.
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Got a full body massage Didn't pop a boner
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Carried laundry from laundry room to bedroom without dropping a sock
207,428 shares
Got made fun of for wearing sunscreen Only one of my friends who isnt a lobster right now
455,746 shares
Got a free beer at the bar. Don't even have boobs.
203,340 shares
Air conditioner at work broken Hot co worker takes off shirt and leaves only skimpy tank on
121,970 shares
Met up with a girl from the internet she is more attractive than in her pictures
189,140 shares
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