someone is breaking into my house! better stay calm and try not to scare them away

someone is breaking into my house! better stay calm and try not to scare them away - someone is breaking into my house! better stay calm and try not to scare them away  Forever Alone

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Not as forever alone with a pet...

LEAVE THE HOUSE JUST SO MY DOG WILL BE HAPPY TO SEE ME

Asked to be the 6th groomsman in friend's wedding There are 5 bridesmaids

Asked to be the 6th groomsman in friend's wedding There are 5 bridesmaids

Forgot to put phone on silent at the movie theater Didn't matter

Forgot to put phone on silent at the movie theater Didn't matter

Last time i got some ass my fingers went through the toilet paper

Last time i got some ass my fingers went through the toilet paper

I paid off all my debts Now no one calls me

I paid off all my debts Now no one calls me

wins a trip for two to hawaii goes twice

wins a trip for two to hawaii goes twice

received one text all day: Walgreen's reminder to refill anti-depressants

received one text all day: Walgreen's reminder to refill anti-depressants

flipping a coin my best chances of getting head

flipping a coin my best chances of getting head

Commits crime still not wanted

Commits crime still not wanted

finally receives a text "Your verizon bill is now available"

finally receives a text
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