Oh, you just drank an absurd amount of alcohol and went to bed at 4am? Let's wake up at 7:30

Oh, you just drank an absurd amount of alcohol and went to bed at 4am? Let's wake up at 7:30 - Oh, you just drank an absurd amount of alcohol and went to bed at 4am? Let's wake up at 7:30  Scumbag Brain

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Someone you love running a few minutes late? Let's imagine how they might have been killed

Someone you love running a few minutes late? Let's imagine how they might have been killed

Hey, did you hear that noise downstairs? WEll, time to think of all the ways a murderer could be breaking in

Hey, did you hear that noise downstairs? WEll, time to think of all the ways a murderer could be breaking in

Hey I know you just closed your garage door but are you absolutely positive?

Hey I know you just closed your garage door but are you absolutely positive?

Hey man, you're about to go to sleep. Here, let's pretend you're falling.

Hey man, you're about to go to sleep. Here, let's pretend you're falling.

Lets you know you still need your house keys Half a second after you shut the front door

Lets you know you still need your house keys Half a second after you shut the front door

oh, your alarm went off. let's brush your teeth and get dressed in a dream

oh, your alarm went off. let's brush your teeth and get dressed in a dream

Remember that great idea you had? I don't

Remember that great idea you had? I don't

Hey bro, you nervous for this presentation? Just add these "uhh's" every 2 words and you'll be good

Hey bro, you nervous for this presentation? Just add these

Hey, you know that girl you're trying to forget about? Well here's a long vivid dream about her.

Hey, you know that girl you're trying to forget about? Well here's a long vivid dream about her.

Hey, you know that song you don't like? Let me play it to you over and over again

Hey, you know that song you don't like? Let me play it to you over and over again
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