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Roses are red, I'm having a baby. Marry me now, or I'll say that you raped me.
461,018 shares
Is it nice touching what your child will one day drink milk from?
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Dating 6 Weeks: Pins wedding invitations and baby announcements to Pintrest
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I save all your voicemails and listen to them every morning
47,999 shares
When I die I want you to die too
195,333 shares
Told my girlfriend we could probably afford a vacation in about a year. Oh, you mean for our honeymoon?
51,191 shares
You should give me a picture of your younger self So i can tell people we have a child
314,766 shares
You say restraining order i say long distance relationship
484,185 shares
Sure you can have "boy's night out" 32 text messages, 45 missed calls, 18 voicemails
274,851 shares
I'm going to learn all your mom's favorite recipes So you'll never need her again
871,361 shares
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