9395 shares
I want to push you down the stairs so you break your legs and call in Then i could cuddle you allllll day
141,623 shares
Comes over for sex Takes the condom when she leaves
410,348 shares
Wow, We've been dating for nine months. We could have had a baby by now.
232,549 shares
I'm making you something really nice for your birthday A baby
386,681 shares
IF we ever adopt, it has to be a boy I don't want you losing interest in me
136,728 shares
I tell all my girlfriends you have a tiny penis so none of them will hit on you
344,199 shares
you're not allowed to wear sunglasses because i need to be able to see if you're looking at other girls
816,261 shares
I got you a GPS car tracking device for your birthday so if you ever get lost I can find you
241,662 shares
i know that you were ordering your food but i hate that you were talking to the waitress
198,077 shares
I'm angry because you gave that girl more attention than me. Even if it was medical attention.
368,018 shares
Laugh more daily