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i asked him to make me waffles for breakfast he handed me a plate of carrots

i asked him to make me waffles for breakfast he handed me a plate of carrots Redditors Wife
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8,768 shares

I don't always comment on your facebook status but when i do, no one else wants to afterwards

I don't always comment on your facebook status but when i do, no one else wants to afterwards Sheltering Suburban Mom
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32,950 shares

Favorite quote is by Marilyn monroe has never seen a movie made before 1990

Favorite quote is by Marilyn monroe has never seen a movie made before 1990 Annoying Facebook Girl
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14,833 shares

if you can dodge a hundred bottle rockets... you can dodge a ball

if you can dodge a hundred bottle rockets... you can dodge a ball Crazy Fireworks Nerd
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10,524 shares

gonna stick these in a cow cook it from the inside out

gonna stick these in a cow cook it from the inside out Crazy Fireworks Nerd
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15,283 shares

not sure if cop or just taxi

not sure if cop or just taxi Futurama Fry
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7,623 shares

Did you hear? I discovered a new use for Polyjuice potion Oh yeah? What's that then? Lubricant.

Did you hear? I discovered a new use for Polyjuice potion Oh yeah? What's that then? Lubricant. Horny Harry
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54,518 shares

Tags a picture of you Turns out its a kitten

Tags a picture of you Turns out its a kitten Annoying Facebook Girl
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14,880 shares

Not sure if friendly Or cheesing me

Not sure if friendly Or cheesing me Futurama Fry
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38,527 shares

we should take all the ugly people and hook them up with blind people

we should take all the ugly people and hook them up with blind people Push it somewhere else Patrick
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118,626 shares