34,505 shares
Smears shit all over restroom walls makes employee rethink job and pursue dreams
47,451 shares
Steals candy from baby prevents future diabetes
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Pepper sprays protesters Protesters gain support
176,011 shares
Makes pizza a vegetable Kids don't like vegetables, eat healthier
41,107 shares
Scares away 'trick or treaters' Prevents childhood obesity.
67,670 shares
Finds new users, downvotes everything they submit. They get frustrated and go outside.
204,634 shares
pulls fire alarm in college dorm force awkward residents to meet each other
18,817 shares
Writes scathing blog post about going on a date with Jon Finkel Jon Finkel becomes most popular man on internet.
Rioters out looting? Burn Down their homes; set them free
11,058 shares
"We'll never grow up to be movie stars" Is actually Brad Pitt
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