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"I wouldn't hook up with you if you were the last man on Earth." "If I were the last man on Earth, you wouldn't even be allowed in line."
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484,529 shares

Never has awkward moments with girls because girls never talk to me

Never has awkward moments with girls because girls never talk to me Socially Awesome Awkward Penguin
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140,824 shares

In a class of about 200 students "Professor, can I go to the bathroom?"

In a class of about 200 students
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616,560 shares

GO TO THE CLASSES? NAH, I'LL JUST READ THE TEXTBOOK READ THE TEXTBOOK? NAH I'LL JUST WING IT

GO TO THE CLASSES? NAH, I'LL JUST READ THE TEXTBOOK READ THE TEXTBOOK? NAH I'LL JUST WING IT Lazy College Senior
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79,067 shares

i run these streets for my early morning exercise routine

i run these streets for my early morning exercise routine Successful Black Man
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244,052 shares

Story must be 1-2 pages? 1 page it is

Story must be 1-2 pages? 1 page it is Lazy Elementary School Kid
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171,601 shares

My butt hurts From sitting on my wallet full of cash all day

My butt hurts From sitting on my wallet full of cash all day First World Problems
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186,081 shares

I think i left my jacket in your room, can I come get it later? I don't think you've ever been in my room, but I looked around anyway. It's not here.

I think i left my jacket in your room, can I come get it later? I don't think you've ever been in my room, but I looked around anyway. It's not here. Sexually Oblivious Rhino
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382,158 shares

I don't always talk to girls I like, but when I do, I... I... Um...

I don't always talk to girls I like, but when I do, I... I... Um... The Most Interesting Man In The World
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244,697 shares

Not sure if all female redditors are hot or they only make the front page because they're hot.

Not sure if all female redditors are hot or they only make the front page because they're hot. Futurama Fry
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291,756 shares