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Actual Advice Mallard

Don't leave your wallet or purse anywhere with a 6 year old around They will find it, find your credit card, and use it without you knowing.

Don't leave your wallet or purse anywhere with a 6 year old around They will find it, find your credit card, and use it without you knowing. Actual Advice Mallard
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The amount of free food and cocktails you get is directly proportional to the quality and quantity of booze you bring for the kitchen

The amount of free food and cocktails you get is directly proportional to the quality and quantity of booze you bring for the kitchen Actual Advice Mallard
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Birth Control

Birth Control Actual Advice Mallard
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Use a coinstar machine they reject pre-1965 silver coins

Use a coinstar machine they reject pre-1965 silver coins Actual Advice Mallard
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if sex takes you and your S/O more than 15 minutes something is wrong

if sex takes you and your S/O more than 15 minutes something is wrong Actual Advice Mallard
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if you dont already own an air conditioner do not wait until summer to try and purchase one

if you dont already own an air conditioner do not wait until summer to try and purchase one Actual Advice Mallard
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WHENEVER YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS SAD SEND HER PICTURES OF PUPPIES AND KITTNES. IT HELPS.

WHENEVER YOUR GIRLFRIEND IS SAD SEND HER PICTURES OF PUPPIES AND KITTNES. IT HELPS. Actual Advice Mallard
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Want Karma? Copy/paste one of the top rated comments in almost any thread on pictures of ducks

Want Karma? Copy/paste one of the top rated comments in almost any thread on pictures of ducks Actual Advice Mallard
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Don't expect beggars to be grateful or for them to like you Being donated is a constant reminder of their failed lives, but it helps them survive, so do it anyways

Don't expect beggars to be grateful or for them to like you Being donated is a constant reminder of their failed lives, but it helps them survive, so do it anyways Actual Advice Mallard
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When it's after 2am, just go to sleep. Nothing good happens after 2am.

When it's after 2am, just go to sleep. Nothing good happens after 2am. Actual Advice Mallard
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