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Actual Advice Mallard

if you can't make a left turn make 3 rights

if you can't make a left turn make 3 rights Actual Advice Mallard
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Instead of going to dinner or a movie, do something active like iceskating or browsing in an Ikea. This way you can talk about interesting stuff all the time or at least have to touch.

Instead of going to dinner or a movie, do something active like iceskating or browsing in an Ikea. This way you can talk about interesting stuff all the time or at least have to touch. Actual Advice Mallard
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If all your submissions get downvoted make a clever meme explaining your situation

If all your submissions get downvoted make a clever meme explaining your situation Actual Advice Mallard
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After getting out of the shower Blow dry your crotch

After getting out of the shower Blow dry your crotch Actual Advice Mallard
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Timid Pooper? Turn the light off in the restroom. anyone inside will make their presence known

Timid Pooper? Turn the light off in the restroom. anyone inside will make their presence known Actual Advice Mallard
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on craigslist, search for "moving" or "asap" that way you'll find the people more desperate to sell

on craigslist, search for
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If you're an animal Don't go to China

If you're an animal Don't go to China Actual Advice Mallard
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when rolling in your empty bins put the smaller bin inside the bigger bin

when rolling in your empty bins put the smaller bin inside the bigger bin Actual Advice Mallard
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INSTEAD OF USING ANOTHER GLASS WASH OUT THE ONE YOU JUST USED, DICK.

INSTEAD OF USING ANOTHER GLASS WASH OUT THE ONE YOU JUST USED, DICK. Actual Advice Mallard
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Smell on your hands won't go away? Wash your hands with aftershave; the smell will come right out

Smell on your hands won't go away? Wash your hands with aftershave; the smell will come right out Actual Advice Mallard
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