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Actual Advice Mallard

If a girl asks you to get something out of her purse Bring the whole purse, it's common courtesy and she'll respect you for it.

If a girl asks you to get something out of her purse Bring the whole purse, it's common courtesy and she'll respect you for it. Actual Advice Mallard
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Drunk words were sober thoughts

Drunk words were sober thoughts Actual Advice Mallard
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don't advertise your company on your car if you drive like a jackass

don't advertise your company on your car if you drive like a jackass Actual Advice Mallard
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If you have a nice car, never park next to a crappy car chances are, they don't give a shit and may hit your nice car

If you have a nice car, never park next to a crappy car chances are, they don't give a shit and may hit your nice car Actual Advice Mallard
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need karma at night? title your post something that the New Zealanders can't resist clicking on

need karma at night? title your post something that the New Zealanders can't resist clicking on Actual Advice Mallard
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Don't touch Peppers and then touch your dick

Don't touch Peppers and then touch your dick Actual Advice Mallard
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skip buying a run of the mill mother's day card buy a blank card and write her a note with your own words, it will mean so much more

skip buying a run of the mill mother's day card buy a blank card and write her a note with your own words, it will mean so much more Actual Advice Mallard
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If she's tweeting She's probably too young for you

If she's tweeting She's probably too young for you Actual Advice Mallard
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IF YOU'RE SPEEDING AND SEE A COP DON'T HIT THE BRAKES

IF YOU'RE SPEEDING AND SEE A COP DON'T HIT THE BRAKES Actual Advice Mallard
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if you're the only guy at a party Stay and never leave

if you're the only guy at a party Stay and never leave Actual Advice Mallard
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