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Actual Advice Mallard

If you're happily married Mistrust your spouse and get a divorce

If you're happily married Mistrust your spouse and get a divorce Actual Advice Mallard
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if the eraser at the end of your pencil has run out use a pencil sharpener to reveal more eraser

if the eraser at the end of your pencil has run out use a pencil sharpener to reveal more eraser Actual Advice Mallard
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If you're an adult you're too old to have crushes, just say something

If you're an adult you're too old to have crushes, just say something Actual Advice Mallard
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material objects are not the key to long-term hapiness

material objects are not the key to long-term hapiness Actual Advice Mallard
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When you see your ex move on, Don't give other men their number in place of yours to make it seem like their new girl is cheating.

When you see your ex move on, Don't give other men their number in place of yours to make it seem like their new girl is cheating. Actual Advice Mallard
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Have a lot of tabs up and a random video ad starts blaring? Click on speakers, mixer: each program you have open has its own volume control

Have a lot of tabs up and a random video ad starts blaring? Click on speakers, mixer: each program you have open has its own volume control Actual Advice Mallard
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When driving on a highway in snowy conditions have two tires on the ribbed strip on the side of the road to maintain traction

When driving on a highway in snowy conditions have two tires on the ribbed strip on the side of the road to maintain traction Actual Advice Mallard
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if chrome slows your computer down you should buy a new computer

if chrome slows your computer down you should buy a new computer Actual Advice Mallard
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USE NO PUNCTUATION TO CONVEY SARCASM

USE NO PUNCTUATION TO CONVEY SARCASM Actual Advice Mallard
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Whenever in doubt or losing motivation in life Think about what you wish you had done as if you were five years older

Whenever in doubt or losing motivation in life Think about what you wish you had done as if you were five years older Actual Advice Mallard
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