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Actual Advice Mallard

Don't talk to her for at least a month Anything you will want to say that first month will make you look petty, crazy, or desperate.

Don't talk to her for at least a month Anything you will want to say that first month will make you look petty, crazy, or desperate. Actual Advice Mallard
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When looking to buy a more expensive item off Craigslist Put $10 in the minimum price box to weed out most of the spammers

When looking to buy a more expensive item off Craigslist Put $10 in the minimum price box to weed out most of the spammers Actual Advice Mallard
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Do not take advice from a duck

Do not take advice from a duck Actual Advice Mallard
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Ask yourself "will this affect me in 6 months?" If the answer is no, don't sweat it.

Ask yourself
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If you want to get laid in the nesting season, make sure you hook up as early as october - november otherwise you'll have to resort to rape

If you want to get laid in the nesting season, make sure you hook up as early as october - november otherwise you'll have to resort to rape Actual Advice Mallard
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Do you really miss her? Try imagining her having explosive diarrhea

Do you really miss her? Try imagining her having explosive diarrhea Actual Advice Mallard
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Be nice to anyone who serves you in any type of business because they are doing something for you and you should have some manners

Be nice to anyone who serves you in any type of business because they are doing something for you and you should have some manners Actual Advice Mallard
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Got a paper due rename a .mp3 to .doc and send it to your professor the paper will appear corrupted giving you a day or two.

Got a paper due rename a .mp3 to .doc and send it to your professor the paper will appear corrupted giving you a day or two. Actual Advice Mallard
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You cannot get pink eye From farting on a pillow

You cannot get pink eye From farting on a pillow Actual Advice Mallard
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if you can't wait 10 days for someone to cash a check give them a money order.

if you can't wait 10 days for someone to cash a check give them a money order. Actual Advice Mallard
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