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Actual Advice Mallard
If Shes willing to cheat on you She definitely isn't the one
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Have a bad gag reflex? Squeeze your left thumb in the same hand.
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Want to quickly fix any PC problem that you can't find a solution for? Google harder.
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If you learn to laugh at yourself embarrassing moment wont haunt you for the rest of your life.
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If a woman is just as happy sitting at home playing video games as she is going on an expensive date She's not
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When writing admissions essays to multiple schools write your bottom school choices' essays first so you've had the opportunity to really refine your statements by the time you get to your top choice's application.
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If you always sit in the middle chair in a row You will never have to awkwardly let people around you
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When farting in the bathroom Use a wad of toilet paper to muffle your asshole
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Don't trust the title of a link It can often be misleading or wrong
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If you cut yourself while shaving Put lotion on the cut instead of blotting it with toilet paper.
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