Actual Advice Mallard

Go to a fast food place right before closing time They might give you some of the leftover food for free

Go to a fast food place right before closing time They might give you some of the leftover food for free  Actual Advice Mallard

If you want to get into a girls pants bet her that they will fit on you

If you want to get into a girls pants bet her that they will fit on you  Actual Advice Mallard

My Beak is a dog Once it is seen it can't be unseen

My Beak is a dog Once it is seen it can't be unseen  Actual Advice Mallard

Leave before the party dies You'll end up with much better memories

Leave before the party dies You'll end up with much better memories  Actual Advice Mallard

tend to forget new names? Repeat them thrice when hearing them for the first time and you won't

tend to forget new names? Repeat them thrice when hearing them for the first time and you won't  Actual Advice Mallard

If you have diarrhea Never trust a fart

If you have diarrhea  Never trust a fart  Actual Advice Mallard

Scared of burning fingers taking hot toast out of the toaster? The handle goes further up than "popped"!

Scared of burning fingers taking hot toast out of the toaster? The handle goes further up than

When turning right on red Don't just look for cars, check to make sure there isn't a pedestrian directly in front of you

When turning right on red Don't just look for cars, check to make sure there isn't a pedestrian directly in front of you  Actual Advice Mallard

HAPPY WIFE HAPPY LIFE

HAPPY WIFE HAPPY LIFE  Actual Advice Mallard

Want to know who stalks you? Deactivate your facebook for a few weeks. Those who go apeshit and ask if you blocked them are your stalkers.

Want to know who stalks you? Deactivate your facebook for a few weeks. Those who go apeshit and ask if you blocked them are your stalkers.  Actual Advice Mallard
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