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Actual Advice Mallard

if you're not about to die, call a cab or friend. ambulances are expensive.

if you're not about to die, call a cab or friend. ambulances are expensive. Actual Advice Mallard
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when high fiving someone look at their elbow, you won't miss.

when high fiving someone look at their elbow, you won't miss. Actual Advice Mallard
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Sick of males pissing on the seat? put some toilet paper in the toilet. That way they will aim for the paper instead of the seat

Sick of males pissing on the seat? put some toilet paper in the toilet. That way they will aim for the paper instead of the seat Actual Advice Mallard
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before you post, enter the link into the search bar it will let you know if you're reposting

before you post, enter the link into the search bar it will let you know if you're reposting Actual Advice Mallard
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Look for the side with the USB logo on it That side faces to the right or up depending on orientation

Look for the side with the USB logo on it That side faces to the right or up depending on orientation Actual Advice Mallard
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if you bitch about your girlfriend to your friends don't be surprised when they hate her

if you bitch about your girlfriend to your friends don't be surprised when they hate her Actual Advice Mallard
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If a guy wants to have sexual relationships with you without a condom Don't, it'll make your life harder and he will probably just leave you alone with the baby

If a guy wants to have sexual relationships with you without a condom Don't, it'll make your life harder and he will probably just leave you alone with the baby Actual Advice Mallard
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If you want to get back with your ex and they say they like a song do what the song says

If you want to get back with your ex and they say they like a song do what the song says Actual Advice Mallard
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Invest in quality toilet paper your ass will thank you for it

Invest in quality toilet paper your ass will thank you for it Actual Advice Mallard
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Want to stop a gross habit? Pretend your life is a TV show, millions are watching.

Want to stop a gross habit? Pretend your life is a TV show, millions are watching. Actual Advice Mallard
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