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College Freshman

Gets email notification saying "Snow Day" Runs outside, eats shit, DIES

Gets email notification saying
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Starts Dorm fire to get out of class On a Sunday

Starts Dorm fire to get out of class On a Sunday College Freshman
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Takes one class of Film analysis Film critic

Takes one class of Film analysis Film critic College Freshman
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First day of class Goes

First day of class Goes College Freshman
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takes first adderall attempts to shave anus for 2 hours

takes first adderall attempts to shave anus for 2 hours College Freshman
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Tries jumping on table Dies

Tries jumping on table Dies College Freshman
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smokes shitty water bottle bong "It's so smooth!"

smokes shitty water bottle bong
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Finishes test early, and has a long break before next class Actually goes to said class

Finishes test early, and has a long break before next class Actually goes to said class College Freshman
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"Hey guys, I got a job!" (cutco knives salesman) dies
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"What are you going to do on Saturday?" "I'm going to check out the football game. Go Beavers!"
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