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Confession Bear

After i scratch my balls I smell my fingers

After i scratch my balls I smell my fingers Confession Bear
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I think telling a woman to make a sandwhich Is extremely sexist and wrong

I think telling a woman to make a sandwhich Is extremely sexist and wrong Confession Bear
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As awesome as you guys are I don't want to meet any of you in real life

As awesome as you guys are I don't want to meet any of you in real life Confession Bear
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Sometimes I feel jealous of redditors with girlfriends then i see pictures of them, and feel better

Sometimes I feel jealous of redditors with girlfriends then i see pictures of them, and feel better Confession Bear
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when im out of weed and dont have a girlfriend i feel like im at a low point in my life

when im out of weed and dont have a girlfriend i feel like im at a low point in my life Confession Bear
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I SECRETLY STEAL MY GIRLFRIEND'S USED THONGS AND SELL THEM TO MY FRIEND WHO HAS AN OBSESSIVE CRUSH ON HER

I SECRETLY STEAL MY GIRLFRIEND'S USED THONGS AND SELL THEM TO MY FRIEND WHO HAS AN OBSESSIVE CRUSH ON HER Confession Bear
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When a girl asks why i am so good at oral i just shrug and say "i don't know" But its really because I used to be fat and lazy and ate snackpack pudding with out a spoon

When a girl asks why i am so good at oral i just shrug and say
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Smoking pot not only cured my eating disorder it brought me closer to my siblings and old friends

Smoking pot not only cured my eating disorder it brought me closer to my siblings and old friends Confession Bear
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I post my failed memes to facebook so that my idiot friends laugh at them and make me feel better

I post my failed memes to facebook so that my idiot friends laugh at them and make me feel better Confession Bear
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I can make myself cry on cue, by imagining my first piece breaking

I can make myself cry on cue, by imagining my first piece breaking Confession Bear
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