Malicious Advice Mallard

tell them you don't want neither of them they'll feel bad and will stop fighting for sure

tell them you don't want neither of them
 they'll feel bad and will stop fighting for sure  Malicious Advice Mallard

Eat lots of butter it lubricates your arteries so the blood can flow more easily

Eat lots of butter it lubricates your arteries so the blood can flow more easily  Malicious Advice Mallard

Stuck outside in the cold? Drink antifreeze

Stuck outside in the cold? 

Drink antifreeze 
  Malicious Advice Mallard

Can't get your baby to stop crying? Shake it

Can't get your baby to stop crying? Shake it  Malicious Advice Mallard

want a girl to give you head? tell her that her face looks slimmer with a dick in it

want a girl to give you head? tell her that her face looks slimmer with a dick in it  Malicious Advice Mallard

if you ate too much chilli pepper and your mouth burns drink lots of water

if you ate too much chilli pepper and your mouth burns drink lots of water  Malicious Advice Mallard

Accidentally closed a window? re-open your browser and use ctrl-shift-w

Accidentally closed a window?
 re-open your browser and use ctrl-shift-w  Malicious Advice Mallard

HAVE A PICTURE ABOUT RELIGION? POST IT TO /R/ATHEISM

HAVE A PICTURE ABOUT RELIGION?
 POST IT TO /R/ATHEISM  Malicious Advice Mallard

if you run out of drink at a restaurant slurp with your straw to let the waiter know you need a refill

if you run out of drink at a restaurant
 slurp with your straw to let the waiter know you need a refill  Malicious Advice Mallard

Leave your phone on vibrate in the library Everyone sitting at your table will thank you

Leave your phone on vibrate in the library
 Everyone sitting at your table will thank you  Malicious Advice Mallard
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