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Paranoid Parrot

I can't eat from this plate The underside is dirty

I can't eat from this plate The underside is dirty Paranoid Parrot
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Browser has spellcheck BETTER copy to MS Word just to be sure before posting

Browser has spellcheck BETTER copy to MS Word just to be sure before posting Paranoid Parrot
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finger glides over wrong key when typing a password "Better start over"

finger glides over wrong key when typing a password
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Get in car late at night reach into back seat to make sure no one is waiting there

Get in car late at night reach into back seat to make sure no one is waiting there Paranoid Parrot
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Increase Military Spending! I think i heard something

Increase Military Spending! I think i heard something Paranoid Parrot
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Goes to bathroom checks phone to make sure didn't pocket dial

Goes to bathroom checks phone to make sure didn't pocket dial Paranoid Parrot
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Reads overly attached girlfriend memes can't text boyfriend...might seem too attached

Reads overly attached girlfriend memes can't text boyfriend...might seem too attached Paranoid Parrot
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Receives oral Closely monitors partner to ensure she doesn't spit it into her vagina

Receives oral Closely monitors partner to ensure she doesn't spit it into her vagina Paranoid Parrot
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goes to use the bidet everyone in the house can hear me

goes to use the bidet everyone in the house can hear me Paranoid Parrot
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are you kidding meeeeee????????

are you kidding meeeeee???????? Paranoid Parrot
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