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Paranoid Parrot

People keep commenting on how great I look It's a joke and they're all in on it

People keep commenting on how great I look It's a joke and they're all in on it Paranoid Parrot
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Sent my wife flowers anonymously she didn't come home with them

Sent my wife flowers anonymously she didn't come home with them Paranoid Parrot
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police car passes Sit straight, check seatbelt, slowdown, smile.

police car passes Sit straight, check seatbelt, slowdown, smile. Paranoid Parrot
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think every runny nose is going to be a bloody nose

think every runny nose is going to be a bloody nose Paranoid Parrot
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barber ties cape around neck omg i can feel my pulse and i cant breathe

barber ties cape around neck omg i can feel my pulse and i cant breathe Paranoid Parrot
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types password incorrectly "I've been hacked!"

types password incorrectly
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gets cleaning agent on hand panic attack

gets cleaning agent on hand panic attack Paranoid Parrot
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students may have sex!!!! put shoes in every door

students may have sex!!!! put shoes in every door Paranoid Parrot
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Reads paranoid parrot memes develops extreme paranoia

Reads paranoid parrot memes develops extreme paranoia Paranoid Parrot
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stranger walking behind me as i head home late at night phone at the ready to call police

stranger walking behind me as i head home late at night phone at the ready to call police Paranoid Parrot
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