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Paranoid Parrot

Allergist says it was the best first self-injection attempt she'd ever seen She thinks I'm a heroine addict

Allergist says it was the best first self-injection attempt she'd ever seen She thinks I'm a heroine addict Paranoid Parrot
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headphones on while listening to guilty pleasure song on bus lowers volume incredibly low to make sure no one can hear through the headphones

headphones on while listening to guilty pleasure song on bus lowers volume incredibly low to make sure no one can hear through the headphones Paranoid Parrot
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Planned to call out sick since the morning Wait until an odd time so they don't think it was planned.

Planned to call out sick since the morning Wait until an odd time so they don't think it was planned. Paranoid Parrot
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FIND PARKING SPOT REAL CLOSE TO DESTINATION LOOK FOR ANOTHER, CAN'T STAND PEOPLE WATCHING ME PARK

FIND PARKING SPOT REAL CLOSE TO DESTINATION LOOK FOR ANOTHER, CAN'T STAND PEOPLE WATCHING ME PARK Paranoid Parrot
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Decides to ignore a call Maybe this person's watching me right now

Decides to ignore a call Maybe this person's watching me right now Paranoid Parrot
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struts through campus at night with taser in one hand and bear grade pepper spray in the other

struts through campus at night with taser in one hand and bear grade pepper spray in the other Paranoid Parrot
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Wins Ebay Auction Obsessively reads item description trying to figure out what's wrong with it.

Wins Ebay Auction Obsessively reads item description trying to figure out what's wrong with it. Paranoid Parrot
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First to pull away when a stop light turns green Is it really green?

First to pull away when a stop light turns green Is it really green? Paranoid Parrot
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commented "It was matter of time" on a post Deleted my comment beCAUSE i MISSED A LETTER

commented
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Click here to conti- Fuck no, I'm outta here

Click here to conti- Fuck no, I'm outta here Paranoid Parrot
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