Paranoid Parrot

watches Jurassic park Checks behind shower curtain for raptors before using bathroom

watches Jurassic park  Checks behind shower curtain for raptors before using bathroom  Paranoid Parrot

Finds sisters bra in the bathroom Doesn't take a picture with it on because she might have a reddit account

Finds sisters bra in the bathroom Doesn't take a picture with it on because she might have a reddit account  Paranoid Parrot

Girl Says she likes my hat she hates my hat

Girl Says she likes my hat she hates my hat  Paranoid Parrot

Sent a text to my boyfriend 1 minute ago why isn't he replying?!

Sent a text to my boyfriend 1 minute ago why isn't he replying?!  Paranoid Parrot

has a glass of wine doesn't drive for a week

has a glass of wine doesn't drive for a week  Paranoid Parrot

Gets a ghost wipe better wipe again just in case.

Gets a ghost wipe better wipe again just in case.   Paranoid Parrot

cough once everyone knows i'm high

cough once everyone knows i'm high  Paranoid Parrot

Throat a little dry in the morning i've got the plague

Throat a little dry in the morning i've got the plague  Paranoid Parrot

Eat cookie dough Spend hours looking up signs of salmonella

Eat cookie dough Spend hours looking up signs of salmonella  Paranoid Parrot

Cops at the door? try not to look like a cop!

Cops at the door? try not to look like a cop!  Paranoid Parrot
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