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Paranoid Parrot

walk into dining hall stoned everyone knows

walk into dining hall stoned everyone knows Paranoid Parrot
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Find Roommate's username on Reddit Read all of his comments to see if any are about me

Find Roommate's username on Reddit Read all of his comments to see if any are about me Paranoid Parrot
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opens mirrored medicine cabinet ready to stab the person that will undoubtedly appear behind you when cabinet door is closed with toothbrush

opens mirrored medicine cabinet ready to stab the person that will undoubtedly appear behind you when cabinet door is closed with toothbrush Paranoid Parrot
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Mom says, "I could see you with an asian woman" Oh god, my browser history

Mom says,
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don't stay in the bathroom too long THEY will think your masturbating.

don't stay in the bathroom too long THEY will think your masturbating. Paranoid Parrot
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Sees Socially awkward penguin think it was inspired by himself

Sees Socially awkward penguin think it was inspired by himself Paranoid Parrot
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Wrong number Rapist calling to see if i'm home alone

Wrong number Rapist calling to see if i'm home alone Paranoid Parrot
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watch the shining read everything backwards just to check

watch the shining read everything backwards just to check Paranoid Parrot
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Transferring to Platteville Too Many Explosions in Whitewater

Transferring to Platteville Too Many Explosions in Whitewater Paranoid Parrot
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Fluoride in water the governments trying to kill us

Fluoride in water the governments trying to kill us Paranoid Parrot
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