Paranoid Parrot

Go to the bathroom lock the door just in case

Go to the bathroom lock the door just in case  Paranoid Parrot

takes girl 15 minutes to text back she's having sex with your best friend

takes girl 15 minutes to text back she's having sex with your best friend  Paranoid Parrot

shes not at school today she died.

shes not at school today she died.  Paranoid Parrot

friends coming over create guest account on computer

friends coming over create guest account on computer  Paranoid Parrot

set alarm for 3:30 a.m. to clear web history for tenth time just in case

set alarm for 3:30 a.m. to clear web history for tenth time just in case  Paranoid Parrot

gets honked at oh god I ran someone over

gets honked at oh god I ran someone over  Paranoid Parrot

room full of strangers at a party scan room for all potential weapons in case of emergency

room full of strangers at a party scan room for all potential weapons in case of emergency  Paranoid Parrot

oh great who did i piss off now

oh great who did i piss off now  Paranoid Parrot

buy condoms, pregnancy test, enema, and gatorade why did the casher fist bump me?

buy condoms, pregnancy test, enema, and gatorade why did the casher fist bump me?  Paranoid Parrot

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