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Paranoid Parrot

Hear a low-flying plane outside It's going to crash into my house and kill me!

Hear a low-flying plane outside It's going to crash into my house and kill me! Paranoid Parrot
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person in room sneezes swine flu

person in room sneezes swine flu Paranoid Parrot
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Done with internet Clears history 5 times

Done with internet Clears history 5 times Paranoid Parrot
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Hears clinky noise while mowing lawn this thing is gonna blow up!!!

Hears clinky noise while mowing lawn this thing is gonna blow up!!! Paranoid Parrot
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Flush toilet Go back a minute later to verify that I did flush

Flush toilet Go back a minute later to verify that I did flush Paranoid Parrot
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Destroyed the enemy last tower OH FUCK THEY'RE COMING FOR ME! TO THE BASE!

Destroyed the enemy last tower OH FUCK THEY'RE COMING FOR ME! TO THE BASE! Paranoid Parrot
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Roommate isn't on the couch? They're getting a gun

Roommate isn't on the couch? They're getting a gun Paranoid Parrot
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Wants to subscribe to risque subreddits makes second account

Wants to subscribe to risque subreddits makes second account Paranoid Parrot
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drops pen neAR GIRL WORRIES, SHE MIGHT THINK I LIKE HER NOW

drops pen neAR GIRL WORRIES, SHE MIGHT THINK I LIKE HER NOW Paranoid Parrot
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Fridge makes strange sound out of nowhere It's going to explode and kill me

Fridge makes strange sound out of nowhere It's going to explode and kill me Paranoid Parrot
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