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Paranoid Parrot

dreams he's peeing wakes up and checks the sheets in a panic

dreams he's peeing wakes up and checks the sheets in a panic Paranoid Parrot
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Uploads to imgur with slow internet afraid someone will post to reddit before he has the chance to

Uploads to imgur with slow internet afraid someone will post to reddit before he has the chance to Paranoid Parrot
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look down to change radio station at night and hit a bump i just hit someone

look down to change radio station at night and hit a bump i just hit someone Paranoid Parrot
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About to send email checks the "to" address at least 15 times

About to send email checks the
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Friend from class introduced me to reddit He thinks I'm a douchebag

Friend from class introduced me to reddit He thinks I'm a douchebag Paranoid Parrot
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Hot girl walking in front of me everyone thinks i'm a pervert

Hot girl walking in front of me everyone thinks i'm a pervert Paranoid Parrot
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Starts peeing oh god I hope i'm not sleeping

Starts peeing oh god I hope i'm not sleeping Paranoid Parrot
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hear loud exhaust outside someone stole my car

hear loud exhaust outside someone stole my car Paranoid Parrot
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chest pain heart attack

chest pain heart attack Paranoid Parrot
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Can't remember if I left the iron on or not Calls electric company to shut off the power

Can't remember if I left the iron on or not Calls electric company to shut off the power Paranoid Parrot
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