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Paranoid Parrot

Posts "I agree with Markwell" as status Checks every ten seconds to see how many people like it

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red puffy eyes from spring allergies don't laugh all day so people don't think i'm high

red puffy eyes from spring allergies don't laugh all day so people don't think i'm high Paranoid Parrot
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138 shares

Last seat on the bus is next to a sick person attempts to break the world record for holding your breath

Last seat on the bus is next to a sick person attempts to break the world record for holding your breath Paranoid Parrot
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uses incognito clears everything anyway

uses incognito clears everything anyway Paranoid Parrot
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Types out entire post might give away my identity; delete

Types out entire post might give away my identity; delete Paranoid Parrot
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arrthmia

arrthmia Paranoid Parrot
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Can't find car in parking lot got towed

Can't find car in parking lot got towed Paranoid Parrot
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Take a piss in the urinal Keep looking back to check if someone is about to push you forward

Take a piss in the urinal Keep looking back to check if someone is about to push you forward Paranoid Parrot
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Makes a rage comic about someone who did something stupid Better not post it just in case it hits the front page, they might see it

Makes a rage comic about someone who did something stupid Better not post it just in case it hits the front page, they might see it Paranoid Parrot
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sees fly in the shower Spy cam!

sees fly in the shower Spy cam! Paranoid Parrot
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