Paranoid Parrot

Head itches I've got lice

Head itches I've got lice  Paranoid Parrot

Bump into stranger Pickpocket

Bump into stranger Pickpocket  Paranoid Parrot

hesitant to turn TV on afraid Jigsaw will come up

hesitant to turn TV on afraid Jigsaw will come up  Paranoid Parrot

Going to sit down on the toilet lift the seat to check for spiders

Going to sit down on the toilet lift the seat to check for spiders  Paranoid Parrot

girlfriend takes birth control pills still uses condoms

girlfriend takes birth control pills still uses condoms  Paranoid Parrot

Crossing one way street Looks both ways

Crossing one way street Looks both ways  Paranoid Parrot

fortune cookie: "your friends will soon give you a great surprise" oh god, i hope it's not rape

fortune cookie:

light turns yellow at the exact moment when you arent to far to stop but not quite close enough to keep going dies

light turns yellow at the exact moment when you arent to far to stop but not quite close enough to keep going dies  Paranoid Parrot

ordered food online it's not coming

ordered food online it's not coming  Paranoid Parrot

Gets perfect score on exam Professor thinks I cheated

Gets perfect score on exam Professor thinks I cheated  Paranoid Parrot
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