Paranoid Parrot

hear a noise outside of tent "oh god no, it's jason voorhees."

hear a noise outside of tent

I have to walk over the bridge at 8 pm. I'm going to die.

I have to walk over the bridge at 8 pm. I'm going to die.  Paranoid Parrot

hear dog barking while walking through neighborhood I am going to be attacked

hear dog barking while walking through neighborhood I am going to be attacked  Paranoid Parrot

quarter inch of wiggle room in roller coaster harness going to fall out during a loop

quarter inch of wiggle room in roller coaster harness going to fall out during a loop  Paranoid Parrot

Sick in morning PREGNANT

Sick in morning PREGNANT  Paranoid Parrot

Craving a pickle must be pregnant

Craving a pickle must be pregnant  Paranoid Parrot

Watches garage door as it closes So the murderer can't roll under at the last second

Watches garage door as it closes So the murderer can't roll under at the last second  Paranoid Parrot

Stomach Ache OH GOD! MY APPENDIX BURST!

Stomach Ache OH GOD! MY APPENDIX BURST!  Paranoid Parrot

taking a dump, bathroom door doesn't lock hold doorknob from toilet in case somebody tries to come in

taking a dump, bathroom door doesn't lock hold doorknob from toilet in case somebody tries to come in  Paranoid Parrot

Tired of posts from certain subreddits Won't unsubscribe in fear of missing something good

Tired of posts from certain subreddits Won't unsubscribe in fear of missing something good  Paranoid Parrot
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