Paranoid Parrot

swipe debit card at the store Don't look at the screen when it says "processing transaction" and it'll be approved

swipe debit card at the store Don't look at the screen when it says

Hear something while masturbating Turns of all lights and stays still

Hear something while masturbating Turns of all lights and stays still  Paranoid Parrot

Family works in shifts to keep me from being home alone

Family works in shifts to keep me from being home alone  Paranoid Parrot

glass was left out overnight probably infected with Ebola by now

glass was left out overnight probably infected with Ebola by now  Paranoid Parrot

use 5 bullets out of 30 to kill enemy better reload just in case

use 5 bullets out of 30 to kill enemy better reload just in case  Paranoid Parrot

*PARENTS TAKING LONGER THAN THEY SAID TO GET HOME* THEY PROBABLY DIED IN A CAR WRECK

*PARENTS TAKING LONGER THAN THEY SAID TO GET HOME* THEY PROBABLY DIED IN A CAR WRECK  Paranoid Parrot

just made a meme on quickmeme quick, upload to reddit before someone steals it

just made a meme on quickmeme quick, upload to reddit before someone steals it  Paranoid Parrot

Hit an iclicker button? Better hit it 10 times just to be sure

Hit an iclicker button? Better hit it 10 times just to be sure  Paranoid Parrot

Hear laughing outside the bathroom Damn it they know I'm in here

Hear laughing outside the bathroom Damn it they know I'm in here  Paranoid Parrot

Reddit is down for maintenance? Did SOPA pass?

Reddit is down for maintenance? Did SOPA pass?  Paranoid Parrot
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