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Paranoid Parrot

clicks on scare gif by accident, at night doesn't go to sleep til it's light outside

clicks on scare gif by accident, at night doesn't go to sleep til it's light outside Paranoid Parrot
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stung by bee imagines throat swelling up for next two days

stung by bee imagines throat swelling up for next two days Paranoid Parrot
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uploads imager to imgur then reddit in less than a millisecond in fear that someone on the internet might find it and post it before him

uploads imager to imgur then reddit in less than a millisecond in fear that someone on the internet might find it and post it before him Paranoid Parrot
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Turn off all lights and is going to hallway to room Checks each room for ghosts murderers before arriving to bedroom

Turn off all lights and is going to hallway to room Checks each room for ghosts murderers before arriving to bedroom Paranoid Parrot
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Headache Brain Tumor

Headache Brain Tumor Paranoid Parrot
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sits on warm seat omg touched butts

sits on warm seat omg touched butts Paranoid Parrot
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You are doing that too much...try again in 3 minutes They know where I live

You are doing that too much...try again in 3 minutes They know where I live Paranoid Parrot
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My keyless entry system code didn't work Oh, god, they must have fired me!

My keyless entry system code didn't work Oh, god, they must have fired me! Paranoid Parrot
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Get home drunk, take a long piss IT'S obvious

Get home drunk, take a long piss IT'S obvious Paranoid Parrot
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Cute girl on train asks to borrow phone. Can't let her use it.

Cute girl on train asks to borrow phone. Can't let her use it. Paranoid Parrot
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