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Paranoid Parrot

Reddit is down oh god

Reddit is down oh god Paranoid Parrot
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Gets on elevator after smoking Everyone can smell me!

Gets on elevator after smoking Everyone can smell me! Paranoid Parrot
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Post got lots of karma deletes it so no one downvotes it

Post got lots of karma deletes it so no one downvotes it Paranoid Parrot
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hear someone walk in while shitting in a public restroom check every 20 seconds to make sure volume is muted on my phone while browsing internet

hear someone walk in while shitting in a public restroom check every 20 seconds to make sure volume is muted on my phone while browsing internet Paranoid Parrot
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Tries to post link to Snowden petition to facebook 3 times. Computer crashes each time before I can post it. "Shit! the NSA is on to me!"

Tries to post link to Snowden petition to facebook 3 times. Computer crashes each time before I can post it.
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Watches 50/50 a while after feels pain in lumbar i'm going to die

Watches 50/50 a while after feels pain in lumbar i'm going to die Paranoid Parrot
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mom not answering phone start planning funeral

mom not answering phone start planning funeral Paranoid Parrot
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Has class on first floor the deer are coming for me

Has class on first floor the deer are coming for me Paranoid Parrot
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Sees a white chevy Slams breaks

Sees a white chevy Slams breaks Paranoid Parrot
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HOME ALONE, HEAR NOISE ABOUT TO BE MURDERED

HOME ALONE, HEAR NOISE ABOUT TO BE MURDERED Paranoid Parrot
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