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Paranoid Parrot

No one I know is in commons Text everyone I know to make sure they're coming

No one I know is in commons Text everyone I know to make sure they're coming Paranoid Parrot
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Someone posts your name in "Forumites You Like" They probably meant "Forumites You Dislike"

Someone posts your name in
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everyone else sleeps with bedroom door open they're going to get murdered

everyone else sleeps with bedroom door open they're going to get murdered Paranoid Parrot
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put cigarette out in ash tray and go to bed get out of bed to check that the cigarette is out

put cigarette out in ash tray and go to bed get out of bed to check that the cigarette is out Paranoid Parrot
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Go out to a house party take ids for the police to identify your dead body

Go out to a house party take ids for the police to identify your dead body Paranoid Parrot
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receive stellar annual review from boss they'll find a way to fire me.

receive stellar annual review from boss they'll find a way to fire me. Paranoid Parrot
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tells son: "there's no such thing as ghosts, silly." laughs nervously

tells son:
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Buying pajamas for girlfriend everyone thinks i'm a crossdresser

Buying pajamas for girlfriend everyone thinks i'm a crossdresser Paranoid Parrot
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sees birds flying overhead will be shat on

sees birds flying overhead will be shat on Paranoid Parrot
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watches a nightmare on elm street seems plausible

watches a nightmare on elm street seems plausible Paranoid Parrot
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