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Paranoid Parrot
gets call from girl thinks her parents found the dirty messages
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Uses pubic restroom checks lock 5 times
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GOES TO THE BATHROOM AT A PARTY TRIES HIS HARDEST TO NOT HIT THE WATER IN THE BOWL
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driving and singing along to music in the car looks behind to make sure no one else is in the car
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phone call with someone unexpectedly disconnects they might have gotten into a car wreck and died
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Finds out theres a pop up on reddit keeps eyes squinted until off computer
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Type /joinevent to join Lilypad race you wont die Store stuff anyways
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Goes to post on reddit double checks grammar, again
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Ex is seeing someone less than a month after breakup bitch was cheating on me
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Goes to imgur.com and gets the "DNS Points to Prohibited IP" message nukes hard drive
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