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Redditors Wife

I asked for help with the dishes He left a picture in the sink

I asked for help with the dishes He left a picture in the sink Redditors Wife
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I asked what he was doing? He said "Winning at Solitaire."

I asked what he was doing? He said
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He didn't want to have sex so he Killed his own boner

He didn't want to have sex so he Killed his own boner Redditors Wife
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thought he was going to thank me for taking care of him while he was sick he just asked me to fetch the camera so he could take pictures of his poop

thought he was going to thank me for taking care of him while he was sick he just asked me to fetch the camera so he could take pictures of his poop Redditors Wife
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Seth said he would go on a date tonight..... but i didn't know it was with a bottle of lotion and his hand:(

Seth said he would go on a date tonight..... but i didn't know it was with a bottle of lotion and his hand:( Redditors Wife
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I asked him if he wanted dessert He said he already had 12 smoothies tonight...

I asked him if he wanted dessert He said he already had 12 smoothies tonight... Redditors Wife
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i told him to pick up some pillows he asked if I wanted the spaceman or honey badger

i told him to pick up some pillows he asked if I wanted the spaceman or honey badger Redditors Wife
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Our daughter asked to go to a concert He gave her a dollar and said,"take your sister too".

Our daughter asked to go to a concert He gave her a dollar and said,
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Put that in your pipe and fap on it

Put that in your pipe and fap on it Redditors Wife
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I asked him why he never shaves he said he left his shaver in the car

I asked him why he never shaves he said he left his shaver in the car Redditors Wife
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