Sheltering Suburban Mom

"No, honey, you're not fat. Don't ever let anyone ever tell you otherwise." Has 8 year-old kid that's 4'6" and weighs 180 lbs.

NEIGHBORS ALARM GOES OFF AT 2AM KIDS WILL NEED THERAPY

NEIGHBORS ALARM GOES OFF AT 2AM KIDS WILL NEED THERAPY  Sheltering Suburban Mom

Not saying your prayers at night heathen

Not saying your prayers at night heathen  Sheltering Suburban Mom

i'm not mad i'm just disappointed

i'm not mad i'm just disappointed  Sheltering Suburban Mom

Can't watch comedy central, too much swearing "Don't you fucking talk back to me like that"

Can't watch comedy central, too much swearing

Complains about picking kids up at night Won't let them bus home in the dark

Complains about picking kids up at night Won't let them bus home in the dark  Sheltering Suburban Mom

glad teen daughter finally started "brushing her teeth" with the electric toothbrush for 20 minutes a day with the bathroom door locked

glad teen daughter finally started

"You need to bring up your grades." Dropped out of school

Be sure to wash the lettuce Mexicans have touched it

Be sure to wash the lettuce  Mexicans have touched it  Sheltering Suburban Mom

"That game is rated 'E for Everyone?'" Everyone but you

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