Socially Awkward Penguin

hears somebody behind walking towards the elevators starts speed walking to get there first to avoid uncomfortable small talk in confined space

hears somebody behind walking towards the elevators starts speed walking to get there first to avoid uncomfortable small talk in confined space  Socially Awkward Penguin

Someone waves because you let them in front of you while driving. Waves back

Someone waves because you let them in front of you while driving.  Waves back  Socially Awkward Penguin

order pizza half meat half veggie so people making pizza will think i have a vegetarian girlfriend

order pizza half meat half veggie so people making pizza will think i have a vegetarian girlfriend  Socially Awkward Penguin

"Enjoy your stay, sir" You too

only machine at the gym you know how to use is free but has a water bottle on it goes home

only machine at the gym you know how to use is free but has a water bottle on it goes home  Socially Awkward Penguin

"are you wearing cologne?" "No, my deodorant activates when I sweat"

Laughed so hard I farted in front of company... Dog looks at me like I'm an asshole

Laughed so hard I farted in front of company... Dog looks at me like I'm an asshole  Socially Awkward Penguin

gets bad haircut still tips pretty well

gets bad haircut still tips pretty well  Socially Awkward Penguin

Ends conversation with Blind friend by saying: I guess I'll see you around then

Ends conversation with Blind friend by saying: I guess I'll see you around then  Socially Awkward Penguin

see language teacher in hallway DON'T KNOW WHAT LANGUAGE TO SPEAK

see language teacher in hallway DON'T KNOW WHAT LANGUAGE TO SPEAK  Socially Awkward Penguin
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