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Socially Awkward Penguin

only person in the store goes through the self checkout line

only person in the store goes through the self checkout line Socially Awkward Penguin
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Boss takes urinal next to him and now is too nervous to pee Pretends to go and uses the restroom upstairs

Boss takes urinal next to him and now is too nervous to pee Pretends to go and uses the restroom upstairs Socially Awkward Penguin
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Check out Facebook pics of a crush Compulsively check Activity log to make sure I didn't accidentally like any of them

Check out Facebook pics of a crush Compulsively check Activity log to make sure I didn't accidentally like any of them Socially Awkward Penguin
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hear familiar tune Ice Cream!!!

hear familiar tune Ice Cream!!! Socially Awkward Penguin
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Misheard friend 3 times in a row "oh, Yeah"

Misheard friend 3 times in a row
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Hits on girl at the playground Turns out she's a 25yr old midget

Hits on girl at the playground Turns out she's a 25yr old midget Socially Awkward Penguin
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Hot girl french kisses me I asked her to have sex with me

Hot girl french kisses me I asked her to have sex with me Socially Awkward Penguin
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"coworker starts going the wrong way while giving me a ride home have her drop me off at a random house a quarter of a mile in the wrong direction and walk home" You pathetic little worm. How about being honest, you probably would have got home quicker.
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Isn't receiving any replies over text Texts self to make sure phone is still working

Isn't receiving any replies over text Texts self to make sure phone is still working Socially Awkward Penguin
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Teacher makes a sex joke you crack up no one else laughs because they don't get it FUCK! YOU AND THE TEACHER AREN'T PRUDES

Teacher makes a sex joke you crack up no one else laughs because they don't get it FUCK! YOU AND THE TEACHER AREN'T PRUDES Socially Awkward Penguin
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