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Success Kid

Came home drunk and hungry didn't order food made a salad

Came home drunk and hungry didn't order food made a salad Success Kid
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Got clean from some hard drugs a year ago today Not a single relapse

Got clean from some hard drugs a year ago today Not a single relapse Success Kid
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Choosing college email address (first name)@(college).edu was available.

Choosing college email address (first name)@(college).edu was available. Success Kid
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Ate Taco Bell before a soccer game Didn't shit my pants

Ate Taco Bell before a soccer game Didn't shit my pants Success Kid
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Girlfriend broke up with me on my birthday 2 months later on her birthday, some guy took her to a fancy hotel room with a Jacuzzi and fireplace. The guy couldn't get it up and she had to spend the rest of the night with a crying man

Girlfriend broke up with me on my birthday 2 months later on her birthday, some guy took her to a fancy hotel room with a Jacuzzi and fireplace. The guy couldn't get it up and she had to spend the rest of the night with a crying man Success Kid
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Wrote a lesson plan Got through it

Wrote a lesson plan Got through it Success Kid
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my ex-girlfriend looks amazing her new boyfriend obviously autistic

my ex-girlfriend looks amazing her new boyfriend obviously autistic Success Kid
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tried sushi from a gas station it was delicious, didn't die

tried sushi from a gas station it was delicious, didn't die Success Kid
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First time having sex... Girl said "I knew what I was doing"

First time having sex... Girl said
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Pees with the toilet seat down Didn't get any pee on the seat

Pees with the toilet seat down Didn't get any pee on the seat Success Kid
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